Picking up the mail today there was this letter to the wife from the Wally World Store down the drive , me being snoopy , I opened it and guess what...........
Dear Mrs. Oldsparkey
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a
commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been
forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr.
Oldsparkey are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras. :roll:
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5 minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in House wares. Get on it right away'
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
6. August 14: Moved the 'CAUTION- WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other
shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
9. September 4th: Looked right into the security camera and used it as
a mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he
asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna Look'
by using different sizes of funnels
13. October 18: He hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed by, he yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
and last, but not least
15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile,
then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.
Regards,
Tom Richards
Wal-Mart Manager
Now I ask you as a normal thinking person ..... What in the Hades did I do wrong :?: They will not see me in there again , I have a wig and fake mustache .... He He He he.
Chuck.
Dear Mrs. Oldsparkey
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a
commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been
forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr.
Oldsparkey are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras. :roll:
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5 minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in House wares. Get on it right away'
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
6. August 14: Moved the 'CAUTION- WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other
shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
9. September 4th: Looked right into the security camera and used it as
a mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he
asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna Look'
by using different sizes of funnels
13. October 18: He hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed by, he yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
and last, but not least
15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile,
then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.
Regards,
Tom Richards
Wal-Mart Manager
Now I ask you as a normal thinking person ..... What in the Hades did I do wrong :?: They will not see me in there again , I have a wig and fake mustache .... He He He he.
Chuck.