A high-profile, successful attorney from Los Angeles was invited to Texas for a goose hunt. The group set up their spread in a field and began calling. Some geese came in and the shooting commenced. The lawyer wounded one that struggled on crippled, and finally went down in the middle of the next field over. The lawyer walked over to the fence and began to climb through, determined to claim his goose. As he climbed through the fence a weatherbeaten old pickup rattled up on the other side of the fence and stopped. An old, leatherskinned rancher stepped out of the truck and asked the lawyer what he was doing. The lawyer indignantly replied that he was retrieving his goose. The rancher told him that he was trespassing, and that he'd best get back to the other side of the fence. The lawyer told the old rancher, "You obviously don't know who you're dealing with. I'm a very successful, highly feared litigator; only the richest people in California can afford me.If I don't get that goose, I'll sue you for everything you own. I'll ruin you!" The rancher replied, "Calm down now, young fella. Ain't no need to sue; here in Texas we settle minor disputes like this with the three-kick rule." The lawyer, with a puzzled look on his face, said,"What's this three-kick rule? I've never heard of that." The old rancher told him, "It's simple. I kick you three times. Then you kick me three times. We go back and forth, 'til one of us gives up. The other one wins the argument and gets what he wants."
The lawyer, grinning in anticipation of putting this little old man soundly in his place, quickly agreed. Immediately the rancher launched a lightning kick to the groin. The lawyer dropped to his knees, gasping for air, as the rancher stepped around behind him and kicked him mightily over his kidney. The lawyer moaned and fell over on his side, sobbing, as the rancher stepped back in front of him and kicked him viciously in the face, tearing his nose half off.
The lawyer lay there for several minutes, sobbing and gasping for breath, and trying to get up. Finally, he staggered unsteadily to his feet. With a ragged, hoarse snarl he shouted, "Now it's my turn, you old son of a bitch!"
The old rancher drawled, "Nah..........you win. You can have the goose," as he climbed back into his pickup and started to drive away.
The lawyer, grinning in anticipation of putting this little old man soundly in his place, quickly agreed. Immediately the rancher launched a lightning kick to the groin. The lawyer dropped to his knees, gasping for air, as the rancher stepped around behind him and kicked him mightily over his kidney. The lawyer moaned and fell over on his side, sobbing, as the rancher stepped back in front of him and kicked him viciously in the face, tearing his nose half off.
The lawyer lay there for several minutes, sobbing and gasping for breath, and trying to get up. Finally, he staggered unsteadily to his feet. With a ragged, hoarse snarl he shouted, "Now it's my turn, you old son of a bitch!"
The old rancher drawled, "Nah..........you win. You can have the goose," as he climbed back into his pickup and started to drive away.