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And..... If'n ya sleep in the same tent with Cat Five Jackus Blowholeicus..... Tie yer sleeping bag down with hurricane anchors! Wondering what direction the wind comes from ? BOTH! :shock:

I find a "Chateau De Cardboard" Dago Red and a fine Seegar works wonders! Not those dog turds Jack lights up! :roll: At least the Dago Red is good for the heart and the Seegar keeps skeeters away........ Back problems are a different story. Real tough and hard to ease the pain... I figure it's...

Ya are whatcha eat Barbie..... Or is it it Clemintine? :wink:

The year is 1947 >> >> Some of you will recall that on July 8, 1947, a little over 63 years >> ago, witnesses claim that an unidentified flying object (UFO) with >> five aliens aboard crashed onto a sheep and mule ranch just outside >> Roswell , New Mexico . This is a well known incident...

WHERE DID PISS POOR COME FROM They used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee in a pot & then once a day it was taken & sold to the tannery.......if you had to do this to survive you were "Piss Poor" But worse than that were the really poor folk who couldn't...

We were in slow-moving traffic the other day and the car in front of us had an Obama bumper sticker on it. It read: "Pray for Obama. Psalm 109:8." My husband's Bible was lying on the dash board & he got it & opened it up to the scripture & read it. He started laughing & laughing. Then he...

Sorry Cat....... But he done good at that age. You jusy might make it!

Airizona makes a law to enforce a federal law and misadministration doesn't like it!!!??? What the HELL!? Another reason to voteemout.... :twisted: http://budurl.com/cometotheusa

A trucker came into a truck stop cafe and placed his order. He said, "I want three flat tires, a pair of headlights and pair of running boards." The brand new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, "This guy out there just ordered three...

1. Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch & you'll have to pee. 2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner. 3. Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is...

Sorry for your loss Chuck... I know how you felt about him. Looks much like my Daugters pup who we lost about 3 years ago. His name was Gus but I called him Buck. I pup sat him on long periods very frequently. He rode in my truck right beside me. He slept on the rug right beside me. He took long...

If it wasn't for me... You guys would have starved without me luring the manatee inshore....Great roasted with olive oil and garlic! :P

Go ahead and laugh y'all! It's all fun and games until ya lose a pair of BVD's! :(

I went to "Lowes"(mega hardware store) recently while not being altogether sure that course of action was a wise one. You see, the previous evening I had prepared and consumed a massive quantity of my patented 'you're definitely going to s**t yourself road-kill CHILI. Tasty stuff, albeit hot to...

Yesterday my wife asked why I didn't do something useful with my time. She suggested I go down to the senior center and hang out with the guys. I did this and when I got home last night I told her that I had joined a parachute club. She said "are you nuts? You're almost 70 years...

cinco de mayo was invented by corona beer about 25 years ago to sell more beer...... nothing else. The mexicans drove back a french attack and pretty much not important in mexico and even less imortant here. Alabama gives driver's tests in English, Arabic, Chinese, Farsi, French, German, Greek...

A guy walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check... He marched straight up to the counter and said, "Hi, You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job." The social worker behind the counter said, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a...

Howdy Muscle man! I'm coming down for the Gulfstream workshop in June, but I'll be tied up with that fun and I'm in Monday night and back out on Friday morning. I will be down for school at FSI Labor Day week. Plan on coming a few days early. Maybe we can do Ebenezer or the Big O for a day if...

One of the reasons I'm quitting can be found in the moral of this story.... :wink: All the organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was the one in charge. "I should be in charge," said the brain, "Because I run all the body's systems, so without me nothing would...

Well.... I was thinking about it and just didn't have the Cajones to do do it. Finally I talked with my financial adviser just before Easter and he said it shouldn't be a problem. He just don't retire in winter because it's not good on the brain. So... I have picked July 1 of 2011 as final date...